AEMTA Lifeline » Just For Fun http://www.aemta.org/lifeline A publication of the Arkansas EMT Association Sat, 04 Sep 2010 02:31:26 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7 en hourly 1 The Rules of EMS http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/the-rules-of-ems/ http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/the-rules-of-ems/#comments Mon, 21 Dec 2009 06:50:56 +0000 Webmaster http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/?p=692
  • Skin signs tell all.
  • Truly sick people don’t complain.
  • Air goes in and out, blood goes round and round, and any variation on this is a bad thing.
  • The more equipment you see on a EMTs belt, the newer they are.
  • If you drop the baby, pick it up.
  • When dealing with patients, supervisors, or citizens, if it felt good saying it, it was the wrong thing to say.
  • All bleeding stops….eventually.
  • All people will eventually die, no matter what you do.
  • If the child is quiet, be scared.
  • Always follow the rules, but be wise enough to forget them sometimes.
  • If the patient vomits in the rig try to hold their head to the side of the rig with the disposable equipment, not the stuff you have to clean.
  • If someone dies by chemical hazards, electrical shocks or other on-scene dangers it should be the patient, not you.
  • Any EMT, FF, LEO and/or scene chief who is more stupid than the patient is the real problem.
  • There will be problems.
  • You can’t cure stupid.
  • If it’s wet and sticky and not yours, leave it alone!
  • If at all possible, avoid any edible item that firefighters prepare, especially the tuna casserole.
  • Heaven protects Fools and Drunks.
  • EMS is extended periods of intense boredom, interrupted by occasional moments of sheer terror.
  • Every Emergency has three phases: Panic, Fear, and Remorse.
  • You are bound to get a call either during dinner, while you are on the can, or at 02:00 in the middle of a great dream.
  • The severity of the injury(s) is directly proportional to the difficulty in accessing, as well as the weight, of the patient.
  • Turret mounted machine guns would work better than lights and sirens.
  • Make sure the rookie EMT knows that a med patch is a radio term, and not a medicated bandage.
  • Paramedics save lives; But it’s EMT skills that save Paramedics.
  • When a patient vomits outside, be sure to aim it at the citizens who wouldn’t back up.
  • Never trust your rig, drug box, or airway bag to be fully stocked. In spite of the assurances of the offgoing crew.
  • If you don’t have it, don’t give up, Adapt, Improvise, Overcome, (then call for a second unit).
  • There is no such thing as a “textbook case”
  • Newbies always look for large things in the smallest compartments and vice versa.
  • There is no such thing as a bad call. Only calls that didn’t go the way you planned.
  • If there are no drunks at an MVA after midnight, keep looking, some one is missing.
  • Remember what MICN stands for, “May I interrupt your Call Now?”.
  • Just because someone’s license date is before yours does not mean they know what they are doing.
  • Newbies have their own way of doing things.
    • ]]>     http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/the-rules-of-ems/feed/     A Paramedic’s Wish http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/a-paramedics-wish/ http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/a-paramedics-wish/#comments Mon, 21 Dec 2009 06:46:24 +0000 Webmaster http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/?p=687 Three medics are walking on a beach, taking a break from an ambulance convention on a tropical island. They happen upon an antique bottle and in examining it, they all-too-predictably release the genie trapped inside. He offers them the obligatory three wishes and they agree to split them: one each.

    The first medic, an Advanced EMT, says, “I want to be ten times smarter so I can better help my patients!” “A noble wish, Master!”, says the genie as he waves his hands. “Granted!” The Advanced EMT is ten times smarter.

    The second medic, a Paramedic, says “Well, I would like to be a hundred times smarter, to better help all the patients I have to work on.” “Another noble wish!”, says the genie and he makes the second medic a hundred times smarter.

    The third medic, a Field Supervisor, pipes up and says, “I wish to be a thousand times smarter, in order to best help all the patients that I must care for, genie.”

    The genie cocks an eyebrow at him and says, “Are you quite sure that that is your wish?” “Yes, that is my wish! A thousand times smarter”, asserts the third medic.

    “Very well! The most noble wish of all! Granted!!”, booms the genie and he waves his hands.

    The supervisor is now an EMT.

    ]]>     http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/a-paramedics-wish/feed/     EMT Definitions of Firefighter Terms http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/emt-definitions-of-firefighter-terms/ http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/emt-definitions-of-firefighter-terms/#comments Mon, 21 Dec 2009 06:44:57 +0000 Webmaster http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/?p=685
  • Alcohol Foams: What happens when you shake a bottle of alcohol
  • Backdraft: A movie about Firefighters
  • Becket Bend: The turn onto Becket Road
  • Donut Roll: A new Dunkin Donut treat
  • Closet Hook: What you hang your jacket on
  • Flashover: To many lights on the fire truck (it looks like a Christmas Tree)
  • Hose Bed: A poor man’s water bed
  • Water hammer: A new tool for banging in nails with water
    • ]]>     http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/emt-definitions-of-firefighter-terms/feed/     Top Ten Reasons to Become a Paramedic http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/top-ten-reasons-to-become-a-paramedic/ http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/just-for-fun/top-ten-reasons-to-become-a-paramedic/#comments Mon, 21 Dec 2009 06:33:41 +0000 Webmaster http://www.aemta.org/lifeline/?p=681 10. You can pretend you’re smarter than EMT’s

    9. You can park anywhere

    8. Nobody questions you when you’re in restricted areas

    7. You get to poke needles into people

    6. There’s no shortage of brain cell deficient humans (job security)

    5. You get to hang out with attractive nurses and doctors

    4. You can drive how you always wanted to ( with lights & sirens)

    3. You know what Reeeaaaally hurts

    2. You can critique TV and movie paramedics and annoy your friends

    1. You get to play with the lights and sirens

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